


The Fruit Ninja Job

by Lets_call_me_Lily



Category: Leverage
Genre: Established Relationship, Holly Poly 2020, Multi, Post-Canon, Queerplatonic Relationships, Slice of Life, slice of fruit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 12:49:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28706940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lets_call_me_Lily/pseuds/Lets_call_me_Lily
Summary: Parker definitely counts as a ninja, right? Right.
Relationships: Alec Hardison & Parker & Eliot Spencer, Alec Hardison/Parker/Eliot Spencer
Comments: 10
Kudos: 45
Collections: Holly Poly 2020





	The Fruit Ninja Job

**Author's Note:**

  * For [weaselett](https://archiveofourown.org/users/weaselett/gifts).



> I hope you like this, weaselett. I think we can safely say that I stayed away from PWPs :)
> 
> This fic is set in a nebulous post-canon time.
> 
> Many thanks to Karios for the beta!

Hardison approaches from Eliot’s left, henley tight across his shoulders, no hidden weapons, hand outstretched. "Hey, Eliot, I need your phone for a sec."

Eliot grunts.

"Phone, Eliot, gimme your phone, man." Hardison wiggles his fingers some more as Eliot fumbles for it.

After having Hardison in charge of the technical aspects of missions for so long, they’ve all pretty much developed a pavlovian response to his fingers thrust out impatiently in their vicinity. There’s no point in asking why until after he’s finished doing whatever upgrades he’s deemed necessary. Eliot makes sure to carry at least one burner phone at all times just in case he ever needs to take an emergency call while Hardison’s holding his actual phone hostage with promises of increased storage, higher resolution cameras and—well, Eliot usually tunes out of the one-man geek party ‘round about then.

When he gets it back and asks, "What’d you do to it this time? In _English_ , Hardison," there are no hinky explanations about clouds or streams or anything else that sounds like a weather pattern, thank god. Instead, Hardison swipes around till he gets to a screen filled with apps Eliot doesn’t recognise.

"What’s Big Burger Challenge?" Eliot frowns at the anime lady with a prominent bust. Could be she’s holding a burger. The app picture’s small. "Hardison, did you put porn on my phone without permission? That’s not cool, man—"

But Hardison’s squawk of indignation cuts him off. "Get you porn? You think Big Burger Challenge is porn? Eliot, that’s just nasty, no, I did not get you porn."

His flailing draws Parker over, and Eliot can feel her looking over his shoulder. "Is this what porn looks like when it’s on a phone?" she asks, head tilted so her ponytail swings, eyes atwinkle as she riles Hardison up. Eliot gives her a fond look as he lays a hand over one of hers.

"I’m not giving y’all porn! C’mon this is—look, okay, they’re games; they’re just games I thought Eliot would like, they’re all about food in some way, and this one," and here he shoots them both a pointed look, "is a competition about making the biggest burger without it collapsing. One of my D&D friends recommended it."

He taps on another app, bringing up a screen with a floating watermelon inside a golden ring with the word ‘classic’ on it and some locked level rings.

"This is Fruit Ninja." Hardison looks at Eliot proudly, and runs him and Parker through the game.

"I picked it specially for you, because you like knives and you’re into cooking, get it? There’s different challenge modes, and you can verse other players, and instead of looking at Sterling like you wanna chop his fingers off one by one, you can use this as stress relief! No one gets sliced, apart from the fruit. It’s a win all ‘round."

This is thoughtful of Hardison, but pointless. Eliot has much more useful, and satisfying, ways of getting stress relief.

"I don’t need crappy phone games, Hardison. I got enough knives in the real world." He reaches out and retrieves his phone, making sure to keep his grip gentle. As an afterthought, he busses Hardison on the cheek and they knock shoulders. Well, Eliot’s shoulder bumps into Hardison’s bicep. Ugh. Eliot frowns at the reminder, and Hardison grins back in that distinctive way of his.

As Eliot heads to the kitchen to start marinating the tofu for tonight’s stir fry, he hears Parker asking Hardison how his imaginary friends in the computer have access to phones.

* * *

A week later, Alec glances away from the 3D dragon costume he’s modelling for their next con to check where he’s left his orange soda.

"Park—Parker. Is that Eliot’s? Why do you have, okay, what’s going on here?"

Maybe Parker thought that he wouldn’t notice her cross-legged on the floor across from him with her back to the couch, but he has peripheral vision. He pays attention to things around him, _Eliot_. Granted, he… doesn’t know how long she’s been there, but he’s noticed her now. And that is not her phone.

"This is, like, the third time I’ve seen you with Eliot’s phone today. If you’re practising your lifts, can we please do it with dummy phones? I can get you some old phones that we burned, if the shape and weight are important," he adds when Parker pouts.

"No, I need Eliot’s phone."

Alec switches off the hologram and sits down next to Parker. "Why do you need Eliot’s phone, though? Yours has almost all the same features. Yours has the cool Marvin 2.0 controls programmed into it; Eliot’s doesn’t have that!"

The phone is playing music that Alec recognises: a pan-Asian kung-fu-ey background tune with bonus noises and slashy sound effects. Parker points the screen towards his face, and, yep. That’s Fruit Ninja.

Alec wasn’t expecting that at all. In his defence, there are plenty of reasons for Parker to have stolen Eliot’s phone, and Alec definitely doesn’t profess to know everything that goes through her pretty, kleptomaniacal brain. He’s also never seen her take an interest in games before, unless you count _let’s throw Hardison off tall buildings and make him scream_ as a game, which Alec emphatically doesn’t.

"My phone doesn’t have this. Eliot’s does. And look, I’m at the top of the scoreboard!" Parker’s eyes squint smugly as she adds, "I’m a fruit ninja master; I’ve beaten soooo many imaginary people!"

Alec sighs; he’s still not sure if Parker’s playing a joke on him with the imaginary people on the internet thing, or if she actually believes it. He’s also still not sure why Parker’s playing Fruit Ninja on _Eliot’s_ phone.

"You do know that it’s a free game, right? I can easily download it onto your phone if you like playing it. Heck, we’re bajillionaires! You could have bought it and downloaded it even if it wasn’t free."

Parker leans on his shoulder contentedly, fingers flicking as she starts another round. "Yes, but it’s more fun this way. I get to be a thief-ninja _and_ play the ninja game. Eliot doesn’t mind," she adds as he stomps into the room.

"What don’t I— Goddamnit Parker, what’ve I told you about stealing my phone?" He glares at Alec like this is all his fault.

Alec protests the look immediately: "This ain’t my fault. How is this my fault!"

"You’re the one that put the stupid game on my phone. Now not only do I gotta worry about keeping the cereal outta the kitchen, I gotta watch my pockets all day!"

Eliot crouches in front of them both and holds out his hand. "Phone, Parker."

Her fingers clutch the phone tighter. “No.”

"Hey now, c’mon, pass the phone over."

Parker drapes herself across his front to whisper, "Fine. But I want to stay a fruit ninja. And lots of chocolate." Then she pulls back, and both her hands are empty.

"Thanks, girl.” With a kiss to her cheek, Alec plucks the phone from the back pocket of his jeans and hands it over to Eliot. "Now that’s what I’m talking about."

Eliot rolls his eyes.


End file.
